A lively and engaging romantic comedy about the difficulties of coming out in Vietnam’s still traditional culture…
A boyish young man sits gazing out of an airport window, contemplating returning to the US and life far from his family and native Vietnam. His boyfriend comes and sits beside him, trying to comfort him. They have been on a turbulent trip back to Vietnam which has strained their identities and the relationship between them.
This ambitious Vietnamese drama, the first feature by filmmaker Trinh Dinh Le Minh, discusses both the pain of living far from home and the difficulties of coming out as gay in a still very traditional Vietnamese society. But while good in parts, and engaging enough throughout, Goodbye Mother is marred by too much melodrama, an erratic tone, and some slightly weak acting.
Nâu Vân (Lãnh Thanh) comes back to visit his family and attend his dead father’s memorial ceremony after living in the US for a number of years. His mother (Hong Dao) eagerly awaits his visit. The scene is set for a poignant homecoming. But when Nâu comes through arrivals things proceed differently – he is closely followed by his handsome ‘friend’ Ian (Võ Điền Gia Huy).
Nâu has come back to Vietnam to fulfil family duties but there is a danger that these duties, particularly the idea that he will get married and have children, will entrap him and pull him away from Ian. He struggles to resist these unspoken expectations which are piled upon him.
He repeatedly puts off telling his mother the real nature of their relationship and it is left ambiguous whether she picks up on the obvious signals. Much of the film focuses on the relationship between Nâu and his mother, who also has her own secrets. There are some effective scenes capturing the bond between them.
The film also sensitively depicts the relationship between Nâu and Ian, showing the longing they feel for each other and the way they are forced to repress this in Vietnam’s still traditional society. They dance without touching at a music concert, continually casting each other furtive flirtatious glances. Each morning, they set an alarm so they can clamber into separate beds.
Another character who has an interestingly ambiguous response to the gay relationship is Nâu’s grandmother. Meant to be a little crazy, she confuses her grandson Nâu with Ian, to considerable comic effect. Being elderly, we expect her to be more traditional in her views, but because of the affection she develops for Ian, she is actually surprisingly able to accept the gay relationship. This subversion of our expectations is nicely done.
We first encounter the grandmother sitting in a tree and refusing to come down. This is one of several silly comic scenes scattered through the film. A short while later Nâu’s young cousin has a cartoonish crash on his scooter after drinking beer. Such scenes would be fine if the movie had made up its mind to be a comedy, but the way it lurches between these and attempts at more moving seriousness doesn’t really work.
This shifting tone isn’t helped by some slightly clunky acting. Although the character of Ian seems to deepen as the film goes on, Võ Điền Gia Huy begins the film by giving him just one expression, a kind of goofy grin. Meanwhile, when one of Nâu’s aunts gets into an argument with a customer and starts to cry, the tears feel so forced that it is like something from a soap opera.
This is a shame, because if Goodbye Mother didn’t stray so much into comedy and melodrama, and instead stuck to the more serious issues it seeks to address, it would be an excellent film. As it is, it is already very good in parts. Some of the scenes are really nicely shot, such as one where Nâu goes with his mother to tend to his father’s grave.
There is a great soundtrack and several scenes play out over the chatter of cicadas and other atmospheric natural sounds. Together with the clever unfolding of the relationships between the characters, this makes Goodbye Mother engaging enough to watch, moving along with a lot of energy.
If you can forgive it for its slight flaws and are interested in the issues it explores, or in seeing an example of contemporary Vietnamese cinema, then Goodbye Mother would be well worth watching.